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How About, Don’t Kill Us!

November 28th

“Men are afraid that women will laugh at them. Women are afraid that men will kill them”. I posted that in our office Kudoboard as we are observing the 16 days of activism.

December 2nd

I went for a walk, in Machakos. It was late in the evening, about 6:30 and even though I had wanted to take a longer walk, the moment I got to the last shop and there were fewer people, I turned around and went back to the hotel because I wasn’t feeling safe.

Sometime in June 2020

I and the rest of the world were marooned in our homes because the pandemic. The most I could do those days was workout because there was nothing else to do, I worked by organizing events for moms and gatherings were now banned. I decided to give myself a target of 10K steps per day. One of those days, it was late in the evening, and I had barely walked. My brother offered to watch the kids so I could take my walk. Our conversation went something like this.

Jim: Just leave the kids and go for a run

Me: It’s a bit late, I’ll walk in the parking lot

Jim: Faith, that’s the most boring walk also why would you walk in the parking lot in circles when you can run?

Me: It’s almost 7, I can’t run on the road

Jim: Why?

Me: I am a woman, it’s not safe, so much could happen.

I never did run on the road. He never understood my fear

December 3rd

I am still in Machakos, after the whole days of training, I enjoy taking walks, it’s me time and helps me hit my goal of 7K steps per day. So just like yesterday I got on the road and just walked. I had already walked to one side of the town so I decided to check out the other side. It was a little bit isolated, open field, good road and views. There were no many people on the road but it was early, about 5:30 so I was alert but not scared. Every now and then a boda boda or a car would pass. I eventually get to the huge white house just as the sun is about to set over a hill, it looks amazing. So I stop to take a video. My phone is full of sunsets.

I notice 3 guys standing maybe 150 mts from where I am and they have a boda boda. I think I should turn around, but that shortens my intended walk as I wanted to take the loop. I stand for a few more minutes as I watch the sun and contemplate my next move. Just then, a car pulls over and the driver asks me where I am going. The conversation went something like this.

Driver: Where are you going

Me: I am taking a walk

Driver: Where exactly?

Me: Just the loop, not far

Driver: Are you aware of your surrounding?

Me: Yes I am

Driver: Did you notice those three guys up ahead, I don’t think you should continue, there has been muggings here lately and they don’t look like they have good intentions.

Me: Yeah, I noticed them that’s why I have stopped

Driver: It’s not safe to continue, we actually saw you when we were going down and decided to turn around and warn you. You can either turn around or we can drop you further ahead and you finish your walk. But I would not advice you to walk ahead.

At this point, I was faced with a dilemma I am sure most women have faced, a choice between 2 ‘evil’ if I wanted to still take my walk.

When I eventually got to the road and could think straight, I imagined what would have happened if the driver had not stopped to caution me. Would I have been another statistic? I only had my phone so my next thought was, they would have stolen my phone, maybe raped me maybe even killed me! I could be another statistic; I hated that thought.

Sometime in April 2018

This time I used to work from my friend’s office somewhere on Ole Odume. I was trying to set up mum baby and love and so I was often a squatter in his office. I was planning a trivia night for mums on the lead up to Mother’s Day and I had never been to one, so I decided to go to Mercury ABC to check out the Mwanaume Ni Effort Trivia Night – do they still happen? It was raining heavy that evening. As I left, a couple of people from our office were standing outside talking, they said that in the next office, there was blood coming from the bottom of the bathroom door.

We all gathered courage and decided to check it out. Fearful, we opened the door and found a woman on the floor, stabbed all over her body. None of us had ever been first to a crime scene. So one person immediately called an ambulance and I started calling cops on my phone, the only challenge was I only have numbers for traffic cops. Eventually one picked and said they would alert their colleague. The ambulance also needed us to confirm that the lady was still alive, so they directed us on what to do. I picked a pair of gloves from my firstaid box and needed to check for a pulse, or any sign of life. She was still warm to the touch.

The police and ambulance eventually arrived and unfortunately, the lady had lost too much blood and she died. She and her baby had been stubbed to death by her husband in the office where he worked as a caretaker. The police waited for him that night and when he showed up to try and clean up the scene they caught him. She and her child were killed by someone she trusted and maybe even loved. Her older child was robbed of a better life where his mother is a present mom.

I had forgotten this incident until I was talking to my colleagues today about how women just want to be let to live.

In the past 3 months, 97 women have been killed in Kenya, this is infuriating. We are all either victims or affected, because of how much we have to change our lives to just stay alive!

How about you stop killing us!

Category: #New Reads

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